The Healing of Burns

I have been nuturing things since I was a little girl. My sons, animals, plants, even food. Myles and Aaron laugh at me because if a garlic head or a sweet potato sprouts in my drawer I have to plant it (respect of it surviving in adversity). Burns have to be one of the hardest of all. It is so unlike a broken arm or a cut that is at it's worst when it happens and then heals. Burns almost have a life of their own, kind of like that movie "Backdraft". You think that they are healing or done and then they rear their heads with a vegence out of no where. Myles' finger, I thought, was the last of putting out the fire of his wounds but sorry to say I was wrong. During bandage change and removing the pressure garment on his left arm, in the front of his elbow, there was a hole. Not a small little hole but a hole the size of a nickel! This arm had nothing on it the day before, not a clue to this eruption of integrity. Buggies said he hadn't done anything at school or home that would of "caused" this. Immediately I take pictures to send to Salt Lake as they are my closest access to burn knowledge. According to them this is going to possibly happen with the growth of Myles. (You have got to be kidding, right). It is called a deepish ulcer and something that is VERY hard to heal (quote from the doctor). It forms when the areas of tightness on his graphs literally split open which will continue as long as he is growing. Myles is barely five feet and with his father being six one, I fear that he has a lot of growing to do. He is going to have to wear a splint on his arm until it heals, which is not a good thing for therapy, OR if it doesn't heal, he will need to go for another surgery in Salt Lake to relieve the tightness and regraph the hole.
I know that many of you that read this blog are probably getting tired of the set backs in our lives, so am I, but it is my way of keeping a journal of what we are going through. I truly envy all of you that can just choose not to log onto a website if you don't want to deal with it, it is not an option for me. I am glad of this fact, as I am in it for the long haul, the true MOM thing to do.

On a good note, other than this, Myles is doing great... in attitude, school, and his acceptance of all of this. He truly is amazing, his spirit, his acceptance, his just being buggies, him telling me that it is ALL going to be alright, he saves my soul and I am blessed for both of my sons.

Fearful decisions

Sometimes in our lives we have to make fearful decisions. Not a decision based upon fact, intuition, or the true meaning of justice, but on fear. It is a very difficult thing to do. We as a family,are faced with one of these decisions now. Do you agree to something that you know is not right just to "get it over with" and not prolong the anxiety and stress of it all? Do you agree to something that you know is not right because you fear that justice will not be served. I know that things must happen to "get the bad guy" and in this fact, innocence must pay sometimes, but it is a hard thing to accept. Please say a prayer for our clarity for this decision as it is a big one, a difficult one, a scary one. Love to all and thanks.

P.S. The picture is of the baby swallows on our front porch whom I hope fly the coup real soon because their mother is getting a little aggresive.

Their First Day

Myles had a great day at school. He was pretty tired when he got home as he is not used to waking up at 6:30 in the morning. Hope had a pretty good first day too. She is doing great for only being a day old. I took her out to play with the other babies but they didn't play nice so she hung out with Myles.

The 8th Grade

Sorry no recent posts. Busy, busy, busy. Myles went back to school today! The 8th grade, I can't believe it. His finger is doing OK but it seems to want to curl up again. Lots of therapy will be needed on this little booger. I was explaining to bugs last night that four months ago, therapy took over four hours. His hands, arms, shoulders, stomach and back all needed therapy for the graphs to grow right. His little finger should be a snap.
I wasn't to sure of how I was going to do today. I have not had a day to myself in so long I can't even remember. I wasn't sure if I was going to fall on the floor and finally really cry or dance naked on the tables in celebration of normalcy. Well I'm not doing either. Mamma (our other goat) went into labor at four am yesterday. She had a real hard time so after six hours of labor we took her into the vet and they had to perform a c-section on her. One of the babies was still born and the other survived. We brought them both home yesterday (to my surprise) and mamma wouldn't have anything to do with her little girl (we named her Hope). So guess what I'm doing today, bottle feeding every two hours even through the night! It's hard to dance on the tables when you have a little goat watching you who thinks that you are her mom. She is adorable though and worth it all. Will post how Myles' first day back at school was.

Baby Videos

Check out some video of the pygmy goat babies!

TRIPLETS!!!!

We were blessed yesterday with the three most adorable babies on the planet. Kassie, our pygmy goat, had THREE kids which is very rare for her first pregnancy. The two brown ones are girls and the white one is a boy. You would of thought that Myles, Aaron, or myself were the parents. We helped clean them up right after birth as three are a handful for mom. They are all as healthy as can be and were up and walking within ten minutes of being born. By this morning they are already jumping in the air and running (falling) around. They are about six inches high and are doing great. Kassie is a great mom! Mamma, our other goat, is going to have her babies any day now. IT'S GOING TO BE A ROMPER ROOM NURSERY around here (we sure needed this as you can not watch them and not smile in your heart).

Babysitting

Myles and I are babysitting for a friend for a couple of months. Her name is "bubbles" and she is a three month old miniature horse. She stands about 18 inches high and that's pushing it. I could not believe my eyes when they took her out of a dog carrier as she looks surreal. Myles named her bubbles because when she drinks water she puts her head way in the bucket and blows bubbles. Toby, our quarter horse, is totally in awe. We all thought teetzie, our mini, was small but as you can see in the pictures, she looks like a Clydsedale. Ged has about two inches on her.

The Pin is OUT

Myles had the pin and stitches removed from his finger this morning. The wound Dr in Boise spoke with the Dr in Salt Lake and decided that he would remove it and save us the trip. Aaron went with us as Myles' anxiety was running a little high and Aaron is good at keeping him calm. We kept telling him that it was going to be a "piece of cake", I guess we forgot the past for a second. Even the Dr. told buggies that the pin was going to slide right out, well it didn't, at least not easily. Three tries, lots of pulling and holding Myles' hand for resistance, it finally released from the bone. With him growing so much right now we think that the bone kind of grew around the pin. When the Dr. said that he has never seen one so difficult to remove, Aaron and I both smiled. Good ole' buggies keeps everyones life exciting. At least we got to keep the pin. The stitches were a little tough also. The were put in like sewing a hem in a dress, one continuous stitch. Not all of the graft took around the edges (right where the stitches were) so upon removing the stitches the dead graft came off at the same time. Yikes! He has a couple of deep holes but we are hoping over time that they fill in. This procedure was quite painful for him (even with some meds) and Aaron and I had to take back our "piece of cake" statement. I'm not sure about when therapy will start and am still waiting for an answer from SLC. He is sleeping right now..................

The BLOG...Wilson

The blog was first created two days after Myles got hurt. Aaron created it as a way of communicating to our friends and family what was going on. I don't completely remember what happen that first month as it all just seems still like a terrible nightmare. The kind of nightmare that you remember, just not in detail. In Salt Lake City I would reread the posts from the previous weeks to remind me that "things were getting better". It also freed me from the complete loneliness and isolation of the Intensive Care Unit and kept us in contact with our friends and family.

This blog has also been a useful tool in many ways, for when a doctor asked me When something happened (blood clots, blood poisoning, kidney failure) I would run to the blog and be able to tell them within a day or two, something that I would of not had a clue. It was also a tremendous inspiration of faith (thank you Kate and Silly), hope, support, and most of all love. I am still in awe at the magnitude of people from all over that went through those first few months with us. It must of been hard being a part of this tragedy and experiencing it through a blog on the internet. Again thank you all for your compassion to our family.

The first time that the newspaper ran a quote that I had written, I felt violated as my posts were for friends, family, and us to remember it all. I realized that our story was supposed to touch many lives, hopefully save many lives and that made it good. If all of this keeps one person from lighting a lighter where they shouldn't, one child to go on through pain, one parent to see how a split second can take your child away, then it has purpose.

This is a very lonely journey for my family. None of us really know how Myles feels in enduring his daily pain, his physical scars, and thoughts of the future. None of us really know how Aaron feels in enduring his daily pain, his emotional scars, and thoughts of the future. Neither one of my sons can understand my pain and fear as a mother of what has happened, and still is. We are all dealing with our own separate journey through this, the same destination, but separate journeys. Maybe when this is all over we will be able to try and explain in retrospect to each other what we just can't seem to do now. As I said, it is a lonely journey that we are experiencing side by side.

This blog site has become a "Wilson" for me, like in Castaway. A friend that I have been talking to, telling our story to, for almost six months now. It doesn't judge, ask for anything, it is something that is just here for me whenever I asked it to be. Like a good friend that you can call in the middle of the night because you can't sleep with too much on your mind.

Through this site this year will be remembered for all that it is, pain, sorrow, fear, hope, love, faith, friendship and family.
Love to you all and thank you for helping us through this path that is ours.

Best Friend Dave

Dave and Myles met at school and have been friends for over a year. He is the kind of friend to Myles that I hoped and prayed for when we moved to Idaho. They are so much alike in their fun activities, but what boys aren't at that age. The amazing thing about these two are there compassion for others. They both nurture babies, the underdogs, the physically handicapped, the old. That is not very typical for boys there age. Dave is actually taking a class this year to counsel at the Special Olympics. When Myles was in Salt Lake City in intensive care, he stood in line for over eight hours to get a baseball cap signed by the Bronco football team for Myles. He comes over and stays with buggies even though Myles can't do much of anything right now. He spent the night on Tuesday night to hang out with Myles on Wed. His day consisted of watching Myles painfully getting his dressings changed on his finger (I think that the pin kinda freaked him out, like us), him getting his shots of factor (which didn't go well as his veins kept rolling and there was numerous sticks), him getting three teeth extracted at the dentist, and an evening of buckets of blood from his mouth (teeth extraction and hemophilia don't mix well). His presence helps buggies cope with all that he has to endure. Dave and I had so much fun (at Myles expense) watching him on laughing gas at the dentist, the whole time that the dentist was drilling Myles was laughing his butt off. Dave won't be going to the same school as Myles this year but there is no fear of their bond breaking. I hope that Dave and his family will be in our lives forever. We love you guys for just being who you are and all of the love that you give us.