Myles is Growing Up

I can't believe how much Myles is changing now. Toby, our quarter horse, was full of mud so we decided to take some cool pictures.

A Visual Song

More Beauty

I can't help but share the beauty. Lot's of snow and it is gorgeous. Myles wants more snow days (hee, hee). We have been dealing with quite a few bleeds lately (and court) but we are doing well. It's not the best but it HAS BEEN WORSE. I want to bring all our animals in the house; horses, donkeys, goats, chickens, to get them out of the cold but can't. They seem to be handling all this OK. It truly seems to bother me more than them that they are out in the cold. The next court date is 2/19 and I can't wait for this to all be over. The stress of court seems to have a direct effect on buggies bleeds.

Beauty

I was driving home from taking Myles to school yesterday and was crossing over the lake. The sunrise was so beautiful. I took this picture with my cell phone but it doesn't do the majesty justice, the lake is partially frozen.

Myles is doing great. He has pretty much got over the hump as far as scar contraction and now his graphs are softening. His range of motion is back to normal as far as we can tell. He will still need to stay in his pressure garments for another six months to a year but he seems to find comfort wearing them. I can't believe how much he has grown lately as he is about a half inch shorter than me (I know, that's not saying alot!). His self-esteem is higher than ever, amazingly. He is truly wise beyond his years.

I hope that everyone has had a chance to catch a snowflake on their tongue this new year.

Fun!

They got him in the end!

Winter is Here!

Finally getting some snow!

To Susie

It's been a year ago today that we lost you Susie. Thank you for watching over us and giving us the strength to go on, a strength that you couldn't seem to have when you were here. You should of let us know of your pain. We have strength beyond words. We could of saved your soul, if you had only let us know. Your nephews and I miss you very much. Myles is really turning into a wonderful young man and Aaron is an unbelievable man, thank you for the influence that you gave them. I see a lot of you in them.

Can you, mom and dad, continue to watch over us for a little while.

Miss you so much,

Your little sister

A NEW YEAR!!!

I don't think that I can come up with the words to describe the ending of this year. I know that it will not be one of those uneventful years that you really don't remember anything "that happened that year". It almost seems that a lifetime has existed in 2007 with every emotion that one can have in a complete lifetime. Fear, pain, sorrow, joy, love, hate, faith, hope, helplessness, despair, compassion, hopelessness, strength....................there is more I'm sure. If we have ever felt that we have survived and succeeded it is now. I truly believe that if Aaron, Tuyet, Myles, and I have triumphed over 2007, we can survive anything that comes in our path in our futures (excuse me, I had to knock on wood). We know that we could not of done this without all of you, your love, prayers, support, and strength, that everyone has given us will never be forgotten. We are all healing in body, mind, and spirit. To a NEW year. May it be a very uneventful one for all of us.

Merry Christmas 2007

Hey All,
Yeah, it's that busy time of the year. Hope everyone had a loving and joyful Christmas. We enjoyed a small and loving time. It was just Aaron, Tuyet, Myles, and myself, we were blessed to be together. We had a little bit of snow on Christmas day, but OH BOY, today is making up for it. Words can not explain the beauty and the feel up here. I applied for a really great position for a job in Idaho, Medical FDA regulations, right up my alley. We will keep our fingers crossed as it is right across the street from Aaron's apartment and very close to Myles' school. We still have some big issue's on infusing buggies through his grafts but we are working to resolve that problem. Aaron's court is coming up soon and weighs very heavy on our minds and souls. Let His will be done! We have survived this far and I am amazed and hopeful that we can continue our strength to the finish of this journey. WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS!
To the New Year!
With love, as always,
Sherry and Myles

December 3 2007

Winter is definitely coming! I have removed all of the flip flops from the wicker bin by the door and filled it with hats, gloves, and scarves. It has snowed a few times already but none has really stuck to the ground. We had a real foggy day last week with 20 degree temps and it sure awakens the sleeping ice crystals. Everything had crystals on it, the horses wiskers, every blade of grass, even the horse hairs that hang from the arena (the picture above). Only God could create such beauty in it's perfection. What a difference from southern California, I love the beauty that each season brings, it's own beauty that no other season has.

We have all been sick around here with the flu's and colds. Aaron, Tuyet, Myles, and I have been ever so lovingly sharing all of our viruses with each other. Myles and I are trying to get our animals ready for Christmas but as you can see in the pictures, that they don't have that Christmas spirit YET. Love from us.

I think Myles has him beat!

Myles met and spent a lot of time with Matt Damon at a fund raiser for Hemophilia five years ago in California. It is so strange to me now to see Myles' arms and hands without the burns.

I think buggies is cuter don't you?

Thankfulness

I have been pondering how I was going to feel about Thanksgiving this year. This year, it sounds like such a short time for all that has happened. I have come to realize that I am truly more thankful this year than any of my past years. What a revelation and a calmness to the pain and scars that this year has left. I would like to share what I am truly thankful for:

Myles is alive.

My sister Sue is in Gods arms and her pain is gone.

The acknowlegement of how amazing the power of prayer is.

That through pain and suffering we grow and truly appreciate lifes every moment.

That my FAMILY is larger than just my two sons.

That things truly do happen for a reason that we may not ever understand but faith will help you accept that fact.

How love can help you bear all burdens.

That my family has become stronger, closer, and wiser.

That when you think that you have no more strength left, God gives you a shoulder to lean on, her name is Mona.

For all of the wonderful people who went through this with us, you shared our pain, sorrows, milestones, triumphs, and gave us strength. THANK YOU!

This Thanksgiving, from our family, is for all of you.

The sunrise pictures where from this morning at my house.

Halloween

Myles thought that this would be an appropriate costume this year. Things are going well but we might have to have another surgery to implant a port in Myles. His hemophilia is really acting up lately maybe due to the fact that he is growing so fast. It took me eleven needles sticks to secure a vein in him the other day for an ankle bleed. It's so hard to find veins through his grafts. Will keep you posted.

With love.............

A Goat?

This is an update on Hope our bottle fed pygmy goat. After two months, she is finally off the bottle and being introduced to the real life of a goat. No more sleeping in front of the fireplace in her warm and fuzzy bed. The other goats are pretty rough on her as she is very, I repeat, very spoiled. She has decided that she does not want to be a goat but a cat. She lives outside with the cats, sleeps with the cats, and spends her whole day doing whatever the cats do. They are truly inseparable. When they chase mice she runs like crazy along side them but has yet to "catch" a mouse herself. Any ideas on her identity crisis?

Homework

Homework project:
Autobiographical Incident: By Myles Ganley 10/23/07

My pulse, my breath, my skin is deteriorating moment by moment. This is by far the worst pain anyone can ever have and it was laid upon me to bear it. Jaws were dropped and tears were flowing like rivers, and denial was everywhere.

Family was screaming with pain and denial. The air was thick with sorrow and unbearable fear. How could this happen to me and my family, why would this happen to me and my family? This couldn’t be true, but be just a horrible nightmare.

Torture was laid upon my small family with nothing that can help that doesn’t include pain upon my body and emotions. Everyday asking how and why over and over, it was said through countless minds. Scraping and screaming, I was tortured only so I could get better.

My family was there every moment by moment and all I could say was that “I love you.” I was thankful that I had them, and grateful that I am alive and emotionally more capable than before.

Healing was full of joyful tears and still sorrow for my little family. Through the whole thing all I asked myself was why and how. We pulled through with love and hope for the best but it was still the most unbearable thing my family and I could take.

Myles Ganley

The Picture

The picture is worth a thousand words. Good stuff!!

Autumn

Autumn is so beautiful. It's a time for mother nature to make drastic changes in everything (except in So Cal, smile). We have all been so busy up here with our changes lately. Aaron and Tuyet are in their new place, Myles is back in school, winterizing the farm and pastures, putting the garden to bed. Auntie Mona came up to see us for a while and it was wonderful and heart warming. She hadn't seen Myles since Feb in Salt Lake City when she came there to be my rock, as she always is. It's amazing to think that she was by my side, actually in the room, when both my sons were born. She has been my best friend, sister, mother, and guardian angel for almost thirty years now. I truly hope that everyone has a "Mona" in their lives.

Myles is doing good with his grafts and playing a lot of basketball. You can really tell that the graphs are maturing and softening up. He is growing quite a bit right now and turning more handsome every day (and boy do the girls notice). Gotta love thirteen. Aaron's ordeal has been postponed until Jan 08 because of lawyer changes. We were hoping that this would be over sooner but it is what it is. I am trying to accept the silence of the day and enjoy the short but beautiful gift of Autumn.

Saturday Sept. 15, 2007

Family update:
Myles is doing good. We finally got the hole in his arm to seal shut but it opened again yesterday while he was playing basketball. Other than that, his grafts have finally reached their peak and should start to soften now. It takes anywhere from six to eight months before the grafts "mature" and stop getting tighter, redder, and thicker. The doctors told us that it will get worse during this time and then start the slow progress of softening, yeah for buggies. He is doing good in school and seems to be back to normal but VERY popular. Thank goodness that Aaron can help him with his Algebra as I don't remember that much (very, very, very long time ago for me).
Aaron and Tuyet are doing well. They are both working a lot, Tuyet has two jobs right now and leaves at eight in the morning and doesn't get home until one am (youth!). The weekends are a welcome time for both of them to relax. They are going to get an apartment at the end of this month in town. We went and saw it today and it is beautiful. It's three levels with around 1200 square feet, two bedrooms, two baths, with the master bedroom in the loft. The complex is gorgeously landscaped with a lake, swimming pool, clubhouse, and complete gym (it even has an indoor basketball court). They are in total awe that it is under half of what they paid for in Orange County for a tiny one bedroom apt. This will be so good for them as this was the plan when they moved here over a year ago and got majorly delayed with all that has happened. Myles and I are going to miss having them live here but we know that it is time. It is time to get back to normal and all start living our lives again. They both want to go back to school, Aaron for his Masters and Tuyet to finish up her Bachelors degree. Hopefully they can buy a house in the near future. At least they are only going to be about twenty minutes away.
I myself am doing OK. I wasn't coping very well there for a while and finally went to the Dr's. They put me on some coping "meds" and I think that they are finally starting to work. I slept a lot the first week (much needed) while my body got used to them. I can definitely tell that my attitude toward life is getting much stronger and back to somewhat normal as I don't feel so defeated as I did. Rough year but I think that we might finally be turning the corner. We have one more thing to deal with for Aaron but I pray that all goes well. Love and thanks to all for your prayers, support, and love.

Down Time

I am always amazed at the strength of people when tragedy calls. Is it the flow of adrenaline, the necessity of the moment, something that is inside of us that shines through? People are always saying to me that they could never handle what we are going through, that they are not that strong of a person. I tell them that they would not believe what they can handle when it involves the ones that they love, a strength that comes from depths of your soul. You don't have to get this strength, it is always there, just waiting for the times that you need it, it comes from God. It happens during earthquakes, it happens during fires, it happens during bombings of the trade center, it happens in the Intensive Care Units at hospitals. A strength that comes out in a person that no one knows is there, until it is needed. You do what you have to do, no questions, no hesitations, you just do it. If you would of asked Myles if he could of endured the all of this pain he has been through, he would of said no. I myself, if asked, if I could of handled all of this, I would of said "NO Way". But we have and are. I haven't posted in a while. My body is catching up to all of the last eight months. When you are in the "immediate response" of it all, you don't physically feel, you mentally do. Your body takes to the sidelines while your mind deals with what is being played out. BUT in the long run, your body will have to step in and tell you what you have been through, physical exertion, mental stress, insanity. It will demand that you physically feel what you have mentally gone through. Body, mind, and spirit, as it should be.

Other Things

Aaron has created a new blog for my need of wanting to express "other stuff". I will continue to update this blog regarding Myles, our ranch, our life. There are so so many wonderful people who care about not only Myles but our family and we love you all. Here is the website for my other stuff regarding my/ours life, my opinions, what I have learned and am still learning.
http://sherryganley.blogspot.com/

The Healing of Burns

I have been nuturing things since I was a little girl. My sons, animals, plants, even food. Myles and Aaron laugh at me because if a garlic head or a sweet potato sprouts in my drawer I have to plant it (respect of it surviving in adversity). Burns have to be one of the hardest of all. It is so unlike a broken arm or a cut that is at it's worst when it happens and then heals. Burns almost have a life of their own, kind of like that movie "Backdraft". You think that they are healing or done and then they rear their heads with a vegence out of no where. Myles' finger, I thought, was the last of putting out the fire of his wounds but sorry to say I was wrong. During bandage change and removing the pressure garment on his left arm, in the front of his elbow, there was a hole. Not a small little hole but a hole the size of a nickel! This arm had nothing on it the day before, not a clue to this eruption of integrity. Buggies said he hadn't done anything at school or home that would of "caused" this. Immediately I take pictures to send to Salt Lake as they are my closest access to burn knowledge. According to them this is going to possibly happen with the growth of Myles. (You have got to be kidding, right). It is called a deepish ulcer and something that is VERY hard to heal (quote from the doctor). It forms when the areas of tightness on his graphs literally split open which will continue as long as he is growing. Myles is barely five feet and with his father being six one, I fear that he has a lot of growing to do. He is going to have to wear a splint on his arm until it heals, which is not a good thing for therapy, OR if it doesn't heal, he will need to go for another surgery in Salt Lake to relieve the tightness and regraph the hole.
I know that many of you that read this blog are probably getting tired of the set backs in our lives, so am I, but it is my way of keeping a journal of what we are going through. I truly envy all of you that can just choose not to log onto a website if you don't want to deal with it, it is not an option for me. I am glad of this fact, as I am in it for the long haul, the true MOM thing to do.

On a good note, other than this, Myles is doing great... in attitude, school, and his acceptance of all of this. He truly is amazing, his spirit, his acceptance, his just being buggies, him telling me that it is ALL going to be alright, he saves my soul and I am blessed for both of my sons.

Fearful decisions

Sometimes in our lives we have to make fearful decisions. Not a decision based upon fact, intuition, or the true meaning of justice, but on fear. It is a very difficult thing to do. We as a family,are faced with one of these decisions now. Do you agree to something that you know is not right just to "get it over with" and not prolong the anxiety and stress of it all? Do you agree to something that you know is not right because you fear that justice will not be served. I know that things must happen to "get the bad guy" and in this fact, innocence must pay sometimes, but it is a hard thing to accept. Please say a prayer for our clarity for this decision as it is a big one, a difficult one, a scary one. Love to all and thanks.

P.S. The picture is of the baby swallows on our front porch whom I hope fly the coup real soon because their mother is getting a little aggresive.

Their First Day

Myles had a great day at school. He was pretty tired when he got home as he is not used to waking up at 6:30 in the morning. Hope had a pretty good first day too. She is doing great for only being a day old. I took her out to play with the other babies but they didn't play nice so she hung out with Myles.

The 8th Grade

Sorry no recent posts. Busy, busy, busy. Myles went back to school today! The 8th grade, I can't believe it. His finger is doing OK but it seems to want to curl up again. Lots of therapy will be needed on this little booger. I was explaining to bugs last night that four months ago, therapy took over four hours. His hands, arms, shoulders, stomach and back all needed therapy for the graphs to grow right. His little finger should be a snap.
I wasn't to sure of how I was going to do today. I have not had a day to myself in so long I can't even remember. I wasn't sure if I was going to fall on the floor and finally really cry or dance naked on the tables in celebration of normalcy. Well I'm not doing either. Mamma (our other goat) went into labor at four am yesterday. She had a real hard time so after six hours of labor we took her into the vet and they had to perform a c-section on her. One of the babies was still born and the other survived. We brought them both home yesterday (to my surprise) and mamma wouldn't have anything to do with her little girl (we named her Hope). So guess what I'm doing today, bottle feeding every two hours even through the night! It's hard to dance on the tables when you have a little goat watching you who thinks that you are her mom. She is adorable though and worth it all. Will post how Myles' first day back at school was.

Baby Videos

Check out some video of the pygmy goat babies!

TRIPLETS!!!!

We were blessed yesterday with the three most adorable babies on the planet. Kassie, our pygmy goat, had THREE kids which is very rare for her first pregnancy. The two brown ones are girls and the white one is a boy. You would of thought that Myles, Aaron, or myself were the parents. We helped clean them up right after birth as three are a handful for mom. They are all as healthy as can be and were up and walking within ten minutes of being born. By this morning they are already jumping in the air and running (falling) around. They are about six inches high and are doing great. Kassie is a great mom! Mamma, our other goat, is going to have her babies any day now. IT'S GOING TO BE A ROMPER ROOM NURSERY around here (we sure needed this as you can not watch them and not smile in your heart).

Babysitting

Myles and I are babysitting for a friend for a couple of months. Her name is "bubbles" and she is a three month old miniature horse. She stands about 18 inches high and that's pushing it. I could not believe my eyes when they took her out of a dog carrier as she looks surreal. Myles named her bubbles because when she drinks water she puts her head way in the bucket and blows bubbles. Toby, our quarter horse, is totally in awe. We all thought teetzie, our mini, was small but as you can see in the pictures, she looks like a Clydsedale. Ged has about two inches on her.

The Pin is OUT

Myles had the pin and stitches removed from his finger this morning. The wound Dr in Boise spoke with the Dr in Salt Lake and decided that he would remove it and save us the trip. Aaron went with us as Myles' anxiety was running a little high and Aaron is good at keeping him calm. We kept telling him that it was going to be a "piece of cake", I guess we forgot the past for a second. Even the Dr. told buggies that the pin was going to slide right out, well it didn't, at least not easily. Three tries, lots of pulling and holding Myles' hand for resistance, it finally released from the bone. With him growing so much right now we think that the bone kind of grew around the pin. When the Dr. said that he has never seen one so difficult to remove, Aaron and I both smiled. Good ole' buggies keeps everyones life exciting. At least we got to keep the pin. The stitches were a little tough also. The were put in like sewing a hem in a dress, one continuous stitch. Not all of the graft took around the edges (right where the stitches were) so upon removing the stitches the dead graft came off at the same time. Yikes! He has a couple of deep holes but we are hoping over time that they fill in. This procedure was quite painful for him (even with some meds) and Aaron and I had to take back our "piece of cake" statement. I'm not sure about when therapy will start and am still waiting for an answer from SLC. He is sleeping right now..................

The BLOG...Wilson

The blog was first created two days after Myles got hurt. Aaron created it as a way of communicating to our friends and family what was going on. I don't completely remember what happen that first month as it all just seems still like a terrible nightmare. The kind of nightmare that you remember, just not in detail. In Salt Lake City I would reread the posts from the previous weeks to remind me that "things were getting better". It also freed me from the complete loneliness and isolation of the Intensive Care Unit and kept us in contact with our friends and family.

This blog has also been a useful tool in many ways, for when a doctor asked me When something happened (blood clots, blood poisoning, kidney failure) I would run to the blog and be able to tell them within a day or two, something that I would of not had a clue. It was also a tremendous inspiration of faith (thank you Kate and Silly), hope, support, and most of all love. I am still in awe at the magnitude of people from all over that went through those first few months with us. It must of been hard being a part of this tragedy and experiencing it through a blog on the internet. Again thank you all for your compassion to our family.

The first time that the newspaper ran a quote that I had written, I felt violated as my posts were for friends, family, and us to remember it all. I realized that our story was supposed to touch many lives, hopefully save many lives and that made it good. If all of this keeps one person from lighting a lighter where they shouldn't, one child to go on through pain, one parent to see how a split second can take your child away, then it has purpose.

This is a very lonely journey for my family. None of us really know how Myles feels in enduring his daily pain, his physical scars, and thoughts of the future. None of us really know how Aaron feels in enduring his daily pain, his emotional scars, and thoughts of the future. Neither one of my sons can understand my pain and fear as a mother of what has happened, and still is. We are all dealing with our own separate journey through this, the same destination, but separate journeys. Maybe when this is all over we will be able to try and explain in retrospect to each other what we just can't seem to do now. As I said, it is a lonely journey that we are experiencing side by side.

This blog site has become a "Wilson" for me, like in Castaway. A friend that I have been talking to, telling our story to, for almost six months now. It doesn't judge, ask for anything, it is something that is just here for me whenever I asked it to be. Like a good friend that you can call in the middle of the night because you can't sleep with too much on your mind.

Through this site this year will be remembered for all that it is, pain, sorrow, fear, hope, love, faith, friendship and family.
Love to you all and thank you for helping us through this path that is ours.

Best Friend Dave

Dave and Myles met at school and have been friends for over a year. He is the kind of friend to Myles that I hoped and prayed for when we moved to Idaho. They are so much alike in their fun activities, but what boys aren't at that age. The amazing thing about these two are there compassion for others. They both nurture babies, the underdogs, the physically handicapped, the old. That is not very typical for boys there age. Dave is actually taking a class this year to counsel at the Special Olympics. When Myles was in Salt Lake City in intensive care, he stood in line for over eight hours to get a baseball cap signed by the Bronco football team for Myles. He comes over and stays with buggies even though Myles can't do much of anything right now. He spent the night on Tuesday night to hang out with Myles on Wed. His day consisted of watching Myles painfully getting his dressings changed on his finger (I think that the pin kinda freaked him out, like us), him getting his shots of factor (which didn't go well as his veins kept rolling and there was numerous sticks), him getting three teeth extracted at the dentist, and an evening of buckets of blood from his mouth (teeth extraction and hemophilia don't mix well). His presence helps buggies cope with all that he has to endure. Dave and I had so much fun (at Myles expense) watching him on laughing gas at the dentist, the whole time that the dentist was drilling Myles was laughing his butt off. Dave won't be going to the same school as Myles this year but there is no fear of their bond breaking. I hope that Dave and his family will be in our lives forever. We love you guys for just being who you are and all of the love that you give us.